Dr Michelle O'Driscoll: Minding your physical and mental health while trying to balance it all

“HOW do you balance it all?” is a question frequently asked of many a busy parent, and one that I don’t think anybody really has the answer to. The truthful answer is usually “I don’t!” – as often for many it can feel like there is zero balance, minimal down-time, or little ease in the day-to-day chaos.

If we’re being realistic, balancing work and homelife commitments is a game you’ll most likely lose on any given day or week. It can be interesting, however, on those rare fleeting occasions where you might feel like you’re mastering the juggle, and taking the madness in your stride, to reflect on what has helped for this to be the case today?

Or, if these moments are non-existent at the moment, then to think about what a smooth day would hypothetically look like for you – and then, what are the things that are currently causing those bumps in the road?

Here are some factors that may or may not be useful to consider.

Effective time management

Waking up and just taking the day as it comes is a luxury that we should absolutely grant to ourselves occasionally, but doesn’t really tend to lend itself to a productive, streamlined day in the great balance of work, life and everything else.

Having some sort of time management strategy in place can send you in the right direction of at least organised chaos. 

This could look like a shared Google calendar, a whiteboard on the fridge, or the good old-fashioned paper planner. Getting everything visually in front of you allows your brain to process and properly prepare for all eventualities, and immediately reduces the overwhelm.

As well as scheduling the tasks, make sure to schedule down-time too. Block out the calendar for those few frivolous hours of not-doing a couple of times a week, and see the energy recharge take place.

If you don’t make time for it, it doesn’t happen – and then everything else suffers.

Boundary-setting

Particularly if working from home, the lines between work and life can blur somewhat, making that elusive balance even trickier to achieve. Having time boundaries in place, such as hours of no laptop or email access, or physical boundaries such as a dedicated room or space for work-related activities can support separation of these.

Our actions can either create or blur boundaries also – saying yes to everything workwise is fine in the short term, but think long-term about what is getting squeezed out of your day or your life to make space for it?

Communicating needs

Balance is all the more achievable where flexibility is possible. And flexibility won’t be possible if your needs aren’t communicated. Communication with employers is key here. These are conversations that many of us are guilty of shying away from, as we presume that our requests won’t be possible to facilitate.

However, there are many reasonable small tweaks that, depending on circumstances, can be easily adopted. It might be drop-off and collection times, the number of work from home days, or the need to take some leave at certain times of year.

It may also be conversations around workload or salary that are needed to address any balance issues that you’re experiencing.

A good employer will be open to these conversations at the very least, and would usually seek to come to an agreement that benefits both you and the work you’re doing for the organisation.

Similarly, such conversations can be had with spouses, older children and family or childcare providers. Getting everybody on board regarding how the days should flow, and what you need from them to support that for the benefit of everybody, is a really positive step to take.

Sometimes, one or more of the above ideas may help to ease the busyness, but sometimes nothing can, and it’s a case of just giving yourself some grace and acknowledging your efforts, however in vain they may feel.

It all gets done eventually, or can get delegated if needed - minding your physical and mental health as a priority is the main thing.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR 

Dr Michelle O’Driscoll is a pharmacist, re searcher and founder of InTuition, a health and wellness education company. Her research lies in the area of mental health education, and through InTuition she delivers health promotion workshops to corporate and academic organi sations nationally.