Trevor Laffan: Advertisers and influencers be warned, I’m a fashion-free zone
He was in his late thirties approximately, but he could have been younger or older because he had a beard and that makes it difficult to be precise.
It wasn’t his age though that I was concerned with, it was his clothing.
He was wearing a pair of jeans that were ripped at the knees. Nothing unusual there, you say, but these weren’t just small tears. The legs were almost completely severed, so much so that I questioned how they were still attached to the rest of the pants.
He could easily have put his foot through the hole ,it was so large. Not only that, but when he passed me, I saw that the back of the of the jeans were also well ripped and I could clearly see his underwear. I couldn’t help but wonder what the point of that was.
If that counts as fashion, then I’m Ralph Armani (sic!)
I suppose we have to give some credit to the advertising and marketing people for making stuff like this popular.
Advertising obviously pays, and some companies spend so much on ads and brand ambassadors that it’s difficult to see how they even manage to make a profit. Take the watch manufacturer Rolex, for example.
Former tennis player Roger Federer was reportedly paid $15,000,000 a year by them just for wearing the product, and he wasn’t the only one. Most of the top guys in his sport seem to be wearing them.
If you’ve ever watched a professional tennis match, you’ve probably noticed the top players gathering up their bits and pieces at the end of the game and stuffing everything into their gear bags. Drinks bottles, banana skins, dirty t-shirts, and towels, all tucked away.
The next step, before they leave the court or prepare for the on-court interview, is to put on the Rolex watch.
They usually pull up the sleeve of their tracksuit top above the watch to make sure it can be seen. The costly sponsorship deal obliges them to flaunt it, which is understandable. The company wants maximum exposure for its investment.
That exposure encourages the monied people to purchase a Rolex, which is good for business. And that’s OK . The wealthy are perfectly entitled to spend their money any way they please.
Not for me though. No amount of advertising will cause me to buy a watch costing thousands of euro, and I will never buy half a pants either.
I don’t keep up to date with fashion styles, and I have no interest in what labels are on my clothes. My wife regularly gives out to me for wearing the same clobber all the time, especially when we’re away, but I don’t care.
I don’t understand what she’s on about because I have a lot of shorts and round neck t-shirts that I interchange on a daily basis. I’ll admit they all look the same, but they do come in various shades of blue. They have the same logo on the front and they’re clean and comfortable. They don’t cost me a fortune either.
This standard issue of uniform suits me fine and can be worn for any occasion. Going to the beach, going for a meal, or when calling to the bank. Throw them wherever you like, on the floor, over the back of the chair or in the boot of the car, and they’re always ready to wear.
They never need to be ironed - at least mine don’t - and when they outlive their usefulness, I chuck them away and return to the same shop to restock.
I am probably an advertiser’s worst nightmare because I’m not the least bit influenced by any of them.
For those impressed by the trappings of wealth but who can’t afford to follow the trend, there is always the temptation to dip their toes in the counterfeit market. It’s big business and there are so many convincing fake goods in circulation these days, it’s becoming increasingly difficult to know what is real and what isn’t.
Online trade in fake goods is booming and there are many pitfalls.
‘Which’, a not-for-profit consumer organisation in the UK, has warned about the dangers of shopping online. According to them, fake cosmetics, perfumes and other beauty and hair products have been found to contain animal faeces and urine as well as cancer-causing and toxic ingredients such as arsenic, lead and mercury.
They say the counterfeit goods trade is the second largest source of criminal income worldwide, behind only drugs.
Huge profits are being handed over to crime gangs and even terrorist organisations, and the import of small batches of counterfeit goods is being used to test out routes for importing other illegal goods like weapons.
The easiest way to avoid all that is to just be yourself. Don’t put yourself under pressure by trying to keep up with the Joneses.
Just wear what you like, drive what suits you and what you can afford, and get a watch that tells you the time. What more do you need.
Caveat emptor - let the buyer beware.

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