Cork man: 'I turned my life round and lost 80kg’

Alan Busteed is a personal trainer, online coach, GAA coach, and family man.

The 35-year-old lives in Watergrass-hill with his partner Patricia, and their five-year-old daughter Phoenix, with another baby due later this year.

Looking at his life today, it would be difficult to imagine the challenges he has faced over the years. His story is one of trauma, PTSD, substance abuse, severe obesity and a suicide attempt, but it is also a story of recovery, resilience, and finding purpose.

Most people know Alan today as the coach who transformed his health, losing almost half his body weight before helping others on their own journeys. What many do not know is the difficult road that brought him to this point.

Growing up in Cobh, sport played a huge role in his life from a very young age. While he enjoyed football, soccer, rugby, basketball, tennis and golf, hurling was always the sport that captured his imagination.

“If I wasn’t playing it, I was watching it,” Alan said. “I was outside every day with a hurley in my hand. I absolutely loved it.”

His dedication paid off. He represented Cork schools through the Munster GAA Primary Game and went on to play for Cork underage teams at various age grades. He also lined out with Imokilly and later trained with the Cobh intermediate hurling panel while still a teenager.

Looking back now, however, Alan believes some of his experiences within the game had a detrimental impact on him. Years later, he would come to realise that constantly feeling on edge and under pressure had affected him more than he understood at the time.

“I was so competitive that I thought it was just part of the game,” he said.

By his late teens, Alan had walked away from hurling altogether. Around the same period, alcohol began to play a bigger role in his life.

“On the pitch I was confident. Off the pitch I wasn’t,” he said. “I struggled with confidence, my appearance and how I felt about myself. Alcohol gave me that same confidence off the field that I had on it.”

Over time, alcohol use escalated into substance abuse involving both alcohol and cocaine.

Despite coming from a loving family and what many would view as a stable upbringing, Alan found himself struggling.

“I couldn’t understand it because I didn’t come from a bad background. I wasn’t the type of person people would expect to end up in that lifestyle.”

Later in life, he was diagnosed with ADHD, something he says helped explain many of the behaviours and impulsive decisions that had shaped his younger years.

He describes constantly chasing stimulation and living life at a frantic pace. At one stage, after standing in a kitchen during the early hours of the morning, he decided he was going to open a restaurant. Within weeks, he had done exactly that.

“That was the kind of person I was. Very impulsive and very erratic.”

While Alan was somehow managing to keep going, many people around him were not. He lost close friends and watched others receive prison sentences, experiences that left a deep impact on him.

“I always felt a huge amount of survivor’s guilt. I felt like I was doing more damage to myself than anyone else around me, yet somehow I was still here.”

The lowest point in his life came following the death of his grandfather in 2018.

As both of his parents worked throughout his childhood, Alan spent much of his youth in his grandparents’ home. His grandfather played a major role in his upbringing and in developing his love of sport. When he passed away, Alan struggled deeply with the loss.

On the day of the funeral, his emotions boiled over and an altercation resulted in Garda involvement and criminal charges. What followed was a court process that lasted more than two years and brought with it the possibility of imprisonment.

Looking back, Alan says the experience became a major wake-up call.

In the aftermath of the incident, he reached what he describes as the darkest point of his life.

Feeling isolated and overwhelmed, he attempted to take his own life.

“I realised that if I wanted things to change, I had to change them myself. Nobody was coming to save me,” he says.

From that point, he began the long process of rebuilding his life.

One of the most important steps was seeking professional help. Although he had once been sceptical about counselling and psychology, he now describes working with a psychologist as one of the most beneficial decisions he has ever made.

During that process, he was diagnosed with PTSD. The diagnosis helped explain many of the feelings he had carried for years.

“You never really feel safe,” he said. “No matter where you are, part of your brain is always telling you that something bad is about to happen.”

He says PTSD affected everything from his sleep and concentration to his ability to relax and form close friendships.

While he has many acquaintances and speaks to lots of people through his work and coaching, he admits that forming close bonds can still be difficult because of the experiences he has lived through and the loss of so many people around him.

Understanding what he was dealing with, however, allowed him to begin managing it and move forward.

The next challenge was his physical health.

At his heaviest, Alan weighed close to 170kg - more than 26-and-a-half stone..

The weight was affecting every aspect of his life. His confidence had hit rock bottom and many everyday tasks had become increasingly difficult.

The turning point came with the birth of his daughter Phoenix.

“Everything changed when she was born,” Alan said. “It wasn’t about me anymore. I wanted to be there for her. I wanted to be a good role model.”

Determined to become the father he wanted to be, Alan committed himself fully to improving his health. He hired a coach, cleaned up his diet and focused on consistency.

“There were no injections, no medication and no shortcuts. It was all done through training, accountability, and a calorie deficit.”

Week after week, the weight began to come off.

What started as a goal to improve his health became a complete transformation. Alan went from almost 170kg to around 100kg on the scales and estimates that his body weight, excluding excess skin, is now around the 90kg mark.

The transformation improved far more than his appearance. It helped his mobility, confidence, fitness, and overall quality of life. It also allowed him to be more active with his daughter and enjoy aspects of everyday life that many people take for granted.

Inspired by his own experience, Alan completed a diploma in personal training and nutrition before beginning to coach others.

Today, he works with people who are facing challenges similar to those he once faced himself. He believes his own experiences allow him to connect with people in a way that goes beyond qualifications alone.

“That’s where I feel I can really help people because I’ve gone through some horrific experiences. I’ve been to very dark places and I’ve managed to come back from them.”

Rather than speaking from theory, Alan speaks from experience. He understands what it feels like to struggle with trauma, substance abuse, poor mental health and severe obesity because he has experienced all of them himself.

Today, his focus is on helping others, raising his family, and continuing to build a healthy life.

Looking back over everything he has overcome, from PTSD and substance abuse to dramatic weight loss and the threat of prison, there is one achievement that stands above all the others.

Being a father.

“There was a time when I never thought I’d have children or a healthy relationship,” he said. “Now I have both, and nothing makes me happier.”

With another child on the way and a career dedicated to helping others improve their lives, Alan says he feels grateful for where he is today.

His message to anybody who is struggling is simple.

Ask for help.

Find somebody you can talk to.

Find a purpose and something worth working towards.

As somebody who has experienced trauma, PTSD, substance abuse, a suicide attempt and severe obesity, he knows first-hand that recovery is possible.

And today, helping others believe that is exactly what drives him forward.

If you have been affected by the issues raised in this article, contact the Samaritans in Cork free on 116 123.