John Arnold: At Lourdes, there were tears as we laid stones for loved ones

It was Aine Roche of Wexford who wrote the beautiful song I Light A Candle For You - its words explain just exactly what it truly means when one hears the words ‘I lit a candle for you at the Grotto’.

Wednesday last week was the last day of our Diocesan Pilgrimage to Lourdes. From around 10pm the night before, Donie Cahill and myself were on ‘night duty’ on the 4th floor of the Accuiel Notre Dame. Along with nurses Maura and Mary, our ten-hour stint was to keep an eye on everything during the sleeping time.

On the 4th floor, dedicated to St Francis, our special guests were the 50-plus Assisted Pilgrims from the Cloyne Diocese in our care.

After a busy and blessed five days in the town near the Pyrenees, everyone slept soundly that Tuesday night, with the next day being our return home, all the packing had already been done.

In our little service kitchen, all that was left were the bare essentials for breakfast the next day and ham for the night staff! We washed the floor and tidied the place, then the four of us talked and talked - for hours.

Amazing, isn’t it - even at 1 or 2am, we were still regaling each other with stories from this and other visits to Lourdes. Unusual, even unexplainable events and encounters happen here on a daily basis.

On the Sunday night previous, I had a unique ceremony in St Joseph’s Chapel - we call it the ‘small underground’. Fr Tiernan Burke - ordained to the priesthood just a week - led us in Evening Prayer and Benediction and imparted his first Blessing. The acoustics in this church with wooden roof beams are brilliant and we had a super rendition of Flowers Of The May - on the last day of May, 2026. It finished just before 9pm.

As the crowd departed, I sidled over to a young Irish couple sitting on the end of my pew. Never shy, I asked had they been to Lourdes before. They told me they came on a week-long holiday to France last year with the first two days in Lourdes and elsewhere after that. So enthralled were they with Lourdes, they cancelled the rest of the holiday and spent the week there! They were back this year.

I told them of my Lourdes experience, as a 14-year-old in 1971 and then back as a 50-year-old in 2007 -and every year since. We talked for over an hour, laughed a bit and cried too as we spoke of our personal experiences.

Eventually, we had to leave when a caretaker, having swept the Chapel, turned out the lights! We walked back through the Domain together- they told me they would love to come to Lourdes in the future as volunteers. People often use the throwaway comment, ‘I could write a book about it’, well, I know I could!

Just after 3am on Wednesday, myself and Donie went down to the Grotto for a while. Even though we’d been here in Lourdes since lunchtime on Friday, I had spent precious little time at the actual Grotto. We’d said rosaries by the river a few nights and had the Passage through the Grotto and the Grotto Mass on Tuesday morning, but quiet time in front of the statue - not really.

At that hour of the morning, we truly had the place to ourselves. I had got a special request for a candle and prayers from a close friend earlier that night, so on the way down I bought one from one of the kiosks.

As we sat there on that stilly, balmy night/morning, the candles on the huge burner barely flickered -there wasn’t a puff of wind. The only sound was the gurgling of the River Gave behind us.

Aine Roche’s song-words were truly apt: “If heaven meets earth/Then here is where they do/In Lourdes at the Grotto/I light a candle for you”. We prayed the rosary and thought of the many people who had asked to be remembered and prayed for in this special place.

Across the bridge, we went to light my candle as requested. Back to the Accueil then past the spot where, in 1866, Bernadette Soubirous bade farewell to Lourdes for the last time. This is a special place for me.

On Tuesday night, a small knot of us gathered there to partake of a little ceremony, ‘Putting the Stones in the River’. We bring a stone from the grave, in Ireland, of special people who really loved Lourdes. I recite that reading from Ecclesiastes about ‘a time for everything’ and when we come to the line ‘A time to gather stones together and a times to throw stones away’, the stones are placed in the river to link forever the memory of those loved ones buried at home but never forgotten here in Lourdes.

On the last day of every Lourdes trip, the late Pat Hickey used to say, ‘This was one of the best Pilgrimages ever’, and he was always right. Yes, we repeat the same ‘formula’ of devotions every year, but each visit is unique and so different.

People ask how would one compare Lourdes with Knock or Fatima or Medjugorje or San Giovanni? There is simply no answer to that query -each place has its own special attributes and only a fool would say that one is ‘better’ than the other!

After a baking hot day on ‘Fryday’ - up to 35C - we had two smashing cool days on Saturday and Sunday and a rainy Grotto Mass on Tuesday - yerra, lovely ‘soft’ rain.

Saturday was an early 7 am rise for me in the Agena Hotel where I’ve stayed with a good few years. Bishop William Crean led our Opening Mass - a real welcoming celebration echoing the joyous message, ‘It’s good to be here’. Those helping as nurses, doctors, handmaidens and brancardiers (male helpers) extend their hands for a special blessing as we prepare to give our time and whatever talents we have in the service of others.

The Bishop, along with Canon Donal O’Mahony and Canon Donal Roberts, are all marking the Golden Jubilee of their priestly ordinations this year - God bless them all.

For many making the Passage through the Grotto, it was their first such experience - a very emotional occasion. We had the Reconciliation service and Torchlight Procession also on the Saturday so I’d say I was asleep before I hit the bed around midnight.

There is a real ‘wow’ factor the very first time one visits the 25,000 capacity underground Basilica of Pius X - built the year I came into this world. After this Mass, Fr Tiernan came over to the Accueil and gave his first blessing to our Assisted Pilgrims - such a special and happy moment.

We were in St Joseph’s on Sunday afternoon to celebrate Mass for the deceased members of the Cloyne Lourdes Hospitalite - the ‘family’ of volunteers who came year after year to give freely of their time here.

As the names of those who died during 2025 were read out, audible sighs and sobs could be heard - yes, it’s hard to think of friends who prayed and cried and laughed and sang with us over the years.

On Sunday, I spent a few hours in The Little Flower where we had a great sing-song. Time was when I could attend such a soiree for four or five nights - now I have to pace myself. In fairness, prayers and processions are such an integral part of the Lourdes experience, but so to is having fun and renewing friendships.

I was privileged on Monday to be one of the ten brancardiers - amazingly, four were from Bartlemy - asked to take part in the Anointing Mass ceremony. Being anointed on the forehead and hands is an unbelievable experience - the Sacrament is for the sick but each of us has some ailment, mental or physical, we all truly need healing.

On Tuesday, I did a whistle-stop tour of places in Lourdes associated with St Bernadette - finishing at the disused, dingy, former prison - the cachot where young Bernadette set out to collect kindling on February 11, 1858.

Sr Fatima gave me the key of the Poor Clare Community cemetery. Years back, I promised ‘the Irish nun’ Sr Therese Marie O’Connell, that I’d sing The Banks at her grave each time I’d come back to Lourdes. We sang it in fine voice last week.

Ah yes, indeed, as Pat Hickey would say, ‘This was one of the best Pilgrimages ever’.