A word of warning: Don’t use Google to solve a pain problem

Famous last words: just while I was waiting.

Now I rarely frequent vending machines, and I don’t eat protein bars.

But it was extremely late, I was starving, and there was this vending machine in the hallway of the hotel where I was staying.

In this vending machine was a healthy-looking protein bar with nuts in it.

I bought one and bit into it.

“Snip” went something in my mouth and broke.

It turned out there was now a chip on a tooth.

And, possibly, a crack.

Bacteria sneaked in.

The gum got a bit tender.

Then just the littlest, smallest bit sore.

I made an appointment to see the dentist.

And, just while I was waiting, I thought I might as well have a crack at treating the infection myself.

I googled. The first thing I learned is that there are different kinds of gum infection.

In consultation, Dr Google and I diagnosed an infection in the form of an abscess.

Dr Google and I also discovered – and please take note of this - that if I was correct and had an abscess, the strong likelihood was that the infection wouldn’t go away on its own.

Only a dentist can deal with an abscess, I read, because the kind of bacteria that cause these infections are extremely nasty and highly resilient ladies who don’t run for the hills at the first sight of trouble.

But, God bless the internet, I learned that it was not beyond the bounds of possibility to reduce the infection and manage the symptoms with some gentle home remedies.

After all, God helps those who help themselves.

Fair enough, I thought. I’d give it a shot.

After all, there was now this little bubble thing rising on the gum.

And a bad taste in my mouth.

Symptoms, Dr Google told me. These are symptoms of a possible abscess.

Ah, I thought, ferociously, alright. Bring it on, you lot. Give me all you’re got. Dr Google and I are ready. We are armed with an unbeatable battery of tried-and-tested home remedies!

First out of the traps was a few drops of tea tree oil mixed with warm water and swished around the mouth. Nothing happened.

Next up was a saltwater rinse, which, I read, can kill off some of the bacteria, and possibly even help to break up the pus surrounding the tooth.

All you needed was some ordinary table salt mixed into warm water. Stir well and swish it around your mouth for a bit, then spit out and repeat.

I did this several times.

Was I imagining it? Had the bubble deflated a bit? I kept at it.

Next up. This was a remedy involving the use of garlic if, the article quipped, you didn’t mind your breath reeking of it.

Now I have great belief in the positive powers of garlic and I have never had a problem with the smell of it. I love garlic. I cook with it all the time.

Dr Google and I discovered that the healing powers credited to garlic are believed to be down to a compound in fresh, raw garlic called allicin, which, I read, may bring pain relief as well as antibacterial properties that can reduce the infection.

The advice was to either try peeling a clove of garlic and gently biting on it with your infected tooth before leaving it against your tooth for a few minutes, or just mince a clove or two and put the paste on your finger and hold that against the affected area.

The garlic cloves in my kitchen cupboard happened to be quite small, so I crushed three or four into a tiny amount of paste. I put it on the top of my forefinger and held it against the little gum-bubble.

I gasped.

A nuclear blast had just gone off in my mouth. It felt like somebody had turned a blow torch on my gum.

Unbelievable.

I took away the paste and shakily breathed out.

That heat-blast was undeniable.

Gotcha, ladies! I thought smugly.

That’ll learn ya!

My gums and the inside of my jaw felt a bit like they’d been torched.

After a while I put my index finger into my mouth and gently explored the gum.

I couldn’t find the bubble.

That rising pimple of infection was gone!

“That is unbelievable,” I declared.

My husband looked at me narrowly.

He squinted.

He came over and tilted my chin.

“Eh, I think your jaw is just swelling so much you just can’t feel that boil thing,” he said.

“Absolutely not! That’s the infection leaving my system,” I declared, wiping the sweat from my forehead.

The inside of my mouth was a bit tender for the next day or two and, it is true, one side of my face – the garlic paste side – did swell a bit before gradually subsiding.

I left things alone for a while.

“It’s definitely better,” I said triumphantly about two days later.

“Aren’t home remedies amazing?”

My husband looked doubtful.

“Check your gum but don’t cancel that appointment,” he advised as, swelling down, I gingerly re-explored the gum.

And there it was.

The old gum-bubble.

The nasty ladies who never run for the hills had not, in fact, run for the hills.

They hadn’t even blinked.