Emer O'Callaghan: Remember, beauty begins within...

Every week, I give tips and advice on the latest beauty treatments and products, and this week I’d like to highlight the importance of beauty from within.

How we all act and conduct ourselves in society - manners and respect for yourself and others - is not as evident in our society today as it was many years ago, when those strengths were the cornerstone of our society, and a sense of community and looking out for each other was the norm.

What has gone so drastically wrong with society today?

When I was a child, my brothers and I on mid-terms and school holidays would go into town with our mum every Friday morning on the No.5 bus from Bishopstown. Happy days - we’d be dreaming about the ice cream in the metal bowls from Roches store’s cafe as a treat.

It was the same routine, every time my brother felt sick on the bus, that distracted mum, and I’d stare fascinated at all the people. My skin obsession started young!

First stop was always the GPO to get mum’s widow’s pension, then over to the English Market to the same butcher my Nanna and mum always went to.

The butcher always had the same back and forth with my mother, and always called her ‘mum’ in front of me, which used to make me laugh.

As a giddy child, I’d be biting my lower lip not to burst out laughing, my mum would be squeezing my hand as she could feel me giggling away. Turning me into her hip, she’d keep my brother on the other side because she knew I’d set him off too.

Even so, I still knew it was great manners and respect that this butcher showed to my mum and all customers, and if you ask me society has gone very backwards on that kind of basic manners and decency.

I see this every day working with the public as a beautician for the last 25 years. I’ve seen boom to bust, pandemic to post-pandemic, and I can tell you, people were far nicer to one another before covid came along.

We have an epidemic of disrespect globally now, and it’s not just a lack of respect for oneself, it’s for everyone else also.

My question is this: when did it become acceptable in society to be so openly bad-mannered, rude, and blatantly disrespectful to other human beings? When did so many stop being mannerly and respectful to others? Where has basic human decency gone?

BAD NEWS EVERYWHERE

We are living in an age of constant bad news, and psychologists say the human brain and body was never designed to process this kind of thing every day.

Every time you turn on the TV, it’s bad news, one shocking story as bad as the rest.

All this constant negativity can affect society, as people are fearful and repeating all this negative bad news in their daily interactions with others.

I don’t want to be hearing constant bad news, my clinic is a positive, peaceful environment, and I protect that peace, we all should be doing that.

I said to my mum recently, if a neighbour called down three times a day, at 1pm, 6pm and 9pm, landed into your front room, and started telling you all the horrific news from all over the world, you wouldn’t be long running them out of the house!

Well, that’s what the constant stream of news is today.

We all have a choice as to whether we want to watch bad news all day or not, and I choose not to, I choose peace and positivity over negativity and chaos all day long.

CANCEL AND HATE CULTURE

Social media has opened the whole world up to everyone on their phone.

The beauty industry has seen the negative effects of this, with lots of unqualified people doling out poor advice. You can watch my popular videos on our Emerald Beauty Clinic Facebook, Instagram and TikTok pages about this.

There is also a ruthless cut-throat mentality now in society via social media, where everyone is judge and jury, and if you make one mistake, you are cancelled - the high horse brigade as I call them.

Who is anyone to judge anyone else, is my attitude, and as the old saying goes, if you haven’t something nice to say about someone, then don’t say anything at all.

WHERE DID PLEASE AND THANK-YOU GO?

Our lovely neighbour in Bishopstown, Mrs O’Driscoll, called me ‘Please And Thank-You’ since I was a child, because if I was sent up to her for something, my mum would have me warned to say those words.

Manners were vital in our house, my mum was so strict about that, and I’m so grateful to her because now, as an adult, I see it so openly in my job and in society, how bad-mannered so many are.

Is it any wonder some kids are so bad when the parents have no manners or decency to show them?

RESPECT IS THE KEY

Our busy season officially started before the long weekend, and the festive season is so mental in our job, with so many Christmas parties and weddings, and everyone wanting to look their very best.

Some customers at this time of year turn up late with no apology, and with a general disregard for others.

We all share this planet, and regardless of how many numbers you have on a bit of paper stating your bank balance, the real winners in life are the ones who show respect.

I see clients every day who have great self-respect, they respect themselves enough to look well doing their beauty treatments and minding their appearance and skin. They invest time and care into themselves, and it’s clear to see a high value woman has fantastic self-respect and in doing so is respectful to others.

However, too many other people are rude and have no manners. Too many are in a rush, heads in phones, not even aware of what is going on around them as they block out the world with their noise-cancelling headphones.

Phones are like a third hand now and many people act like they are robotic and not human.

The lack of empathy in society is very prevalent today, and while we all see it, I will finish on a positive note - this world is still full of decent, kind, beautiful humans who have great hearts, respect and decency for themselves as well as for others.

All any of us can do is mind our own patches and family, but we can do so with mindset of respect for others also.

Maybe it’s time we all took back our power now and made conscious decisions to only think and talk positively, and only focus on the good news and the good in others.

People of all ages can stop and think about how they interact with others: Are we showing basic manners and curiosity, or are we being rude and obnoxious?

We need to bring the awareness back now fast - and spell out that basic human decency and good old fashioned manners will never be out of fashion.

Emer O’Callaghan is a beauty doctor and skin specialist who won Irish Beauty Therapist of the Year and works at Emerald Organic Beauty Ltd, trading as Emerald Beauty Clinic, 021 4365949. A Multi Award Winning Gold Standard Clinic, 2008- 2025, www.emeraldbeautyclinic.ie - follow on Facebook/instagram/ TikTok pages now.

SPECIAL OFFER: All next week, our award-winning Radiance Glow Facial, 90 minutes, is reduced from €125 to €95, includes full skin analysis, eyebrow shape and heated hand treatment. Appointments necessary, to book call Emerald Beauty Clinic, 021 4365949. Free parking for clients.