'The grief does not get smaller. Life simply grows around it': Partner of murdered Cork postman visit his grave every day

The partner of 44-year-old postman Barry Daly, who was murdered in the front garden of their home on a night of sports celebrations in Doneraile, now visits his grave every day.

“I sit with him and tell him everything that is going on in our lives, what the boys are doing, what they have achieved and all the things I wish I could still tell him at the end of the day. I never imagined that after 20 years together, this would be how our conversations would continue,” Katie O’Reilly said in her victim impact statement, read by Garda Maria McCarthy at the Central Criminal Court sitting in Cork.

“Barry and I always spoke about running away and getting married quietly one day and coming back to surprise everyone afterwards because we never wanted the big wedding. We talked about improving the house and growing old together. More than anything, Barry wanted a large happy family. He spoke often about grandchildren and joked that after all the boys he deserved some granddaughters too. That future was stolen from us.

“People say that time heals all wounds. Before this happened, I believed that too. I do not believe it anymore. The grief does not get smaller. Life simply grows around it.

“What was taken from me was not only the man I loved. What was taken from me was my future, my safety, and the life we had spent 20 years building together. What was taken from our children was their father. What was taken from Barry was the chance to watch his boys grow into men and the chance to become the grandfather he dreamed of being,” she said.

Alex Deady, aged 20, of Glenview, Convent Rd, Doneraile, Co Cork, and a 17-year-old — both convicted of murdering Barry Daly, and a 16-year-old who admitted manslaughter, on October 12, 2025, all face sentencing. Deady will be sentenced on Monday, August 31.

Because of a probation report being prepared on the 17-year-old and psychiatrists’ or psychologists’ report assessing the maturity of this teenager, and the 16-year-old, Ms Justice Siobhán Lankford put the teenagers’ cases in for mention on August 7, to be further adjourned until August 31. If reports are not available for that date, their sentencing will be done in mid-September. Deady will definitely be sentenced on August 31, the judge said.

Daly family victim impact statement 

The Daly family’s victim impact statement was read on their behalf by Mags Lucy of Support After Homicide.

“Every time we see an An Post van for a split second you think is it Barry. But it will never be him again.

“Barry was so kind and cheerful. He always had a smile on his face, and was a real people’s person and this showed in his job that he loved as a postman. He was considerate of older people, who he knew may not see anyone else that day. He would always stop for the chats.

“Barry was the spark in our family and now that spark has gone out. The world is altered for us all and now we see danger where it didn’t exist before. We will miss Barry forever. 

"We will speak of him often and never let his sons forget him and his exuberant character. He lives on in all of them. We will remember all of the good times we shared with him.”

Thanking the gardaí and legal team, the Daly family also said: “We want to thank the communities of Doneraile, Twopothouse, and Mallow, who have rallied around us all, not just when this happened but still now. We appreciate greatly all the support you have given to us all.”

The adult son of Barry Daly, Ryan Daly, said he felt for those in the family suffering so much from the loss of his father, namely the deceased’s partner, his parents, and four young sons.

O'Reilly family victim impact statement

Claire O’Reilly spoke on behalf of the O’Reilly family.

“Since Barry died, we’ve learned even more about the kind of man he was. Being a postman was never just a job to Barry. He genuinely cared about the people on his route, especially those who lived alone. There was one elderly gentleman in particular that Barry always made time for. He’d call in for a chat, bring him his newspaper, and make sure he was all right.

“After Barry passed away, that gentleman told us that he now had nobody left and had never felt as alone.

“Hearing that really stayed with us because it summed Barry up perfectly. Barry never did those things for recognition or praise. He did them because he had the biggest heart and couldn’t walk away from someone who needed a little bit of kindness.

“Our little bubble burst the day Barry was murdered. Nothing will ever bring him back. Nothing will ever give us back the life we had before.

“We don’t just miss Barry on birthdays or anniversaries. We miss him in the ordinary moments. We miss his laugh. We miss seeing him walk through the door. We miss having him around the table. We miss the future we all thought we’d share with him. Barry wasn’t just someone we loved. He was part of who we were as a family.

“His murder didn’t just take Barry from us. It changed every single one of us, and it changed our family forever.”

Ms O’Reilly thanked Garda McCarthy and all of the gardaí in the case, particularly Detective Inspector John O’Connell, Detective Sergeant Michael O’Regan, and detective gardaí Anne Flynn, Noelle McSweeney, Aidan Long, Gary Costello, Paul Cotter, Ben McNamara, and Paul O’Shea, for their role in the investigation.