First of all, I suggest you slow down! You and your husband have been together a very long time. Much time, love and investment in all different areas have been put into your marriage and relationship.
You have two beautiful children and love for each other and that is worth a lot. Too much to make quick decisions about!
I am guessing your husband and perhaps you too are in your mid to late forties? This is a very big life change for him and indeed for you.
When we hit the forties, like it or not, changes happen for us psychologically. This is midlife and often involves a reappraisal of a person’s life — looking at what has been achieved and what is left.
This can be quite frightening and often, sadly, people keep these thoughts and feelings to themselves, which is not a good idea. This can further the fears we feel and thus isolate us further.
Your husband may be going through some of this now and that is why you need to sit down and start some open conversations. You are in a very serious crisis where you could do irreparable damage to your your relationship if you do not tread carefully and cautiously.
Please stop and talk to each other honestly about this. Do not let this go on any longer. You have two little people too who need their parents in a good place mentally and emotionally. It may also be wise to have a third party to facilitate an open conversation. It may even be wise to get the professional help of a therapist/counsellor. Best of luck.