Emer O'Callaghan: 'Jealousy is the ugliest of traits...beware of teh beauty saboteur'

You know you are getting old when you hear yourself say lines like, ‘Oh my god, where has the year gone?’

For children, time moves slowly, and with Halloween this weekend it’s nice to see young kids excited about the season.

Well, I can tell ya this much for nothing, being a beautician now for more than 25 years, I have met a few real life witches myself! You can tell from the way in which they behave and conduct themselves - nasty and cruel, and always toxic in the way they speak about everyone and everything.

Ask anyone working with the public today, and they too will know the witches.

That said, I also meet some of the most beautiful souls who are nothing but a pleasure to see and treat, and make my job so much easier and enjoyable.

Jealousy is the ugliest of traits, and all the witches are green, boy!

I experienced something so bitchy recently, and so many people told me that only a woman would do that to another woman, and sadly they were right.

So this week I want to talk about the importance of keeping your beauty secrets to yourself, and why oversharing is how you invite in the beauty saboteur who aims to ruin all your great efforts and results.

I did one of my beauty videos on this recently and you can watch it on our Emerald Beauty Clinic Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok pages.

BEWARE THE BEAUTY SABOTEURS

It’s not fair to say these types are always female, but the majority are.

They can be a so-called well-meaning friend, sister, mother-in-law, work colleague, or anyone you overshared your beauty regime with.

Your skin is radiant and glowing, your make-up is looking flawless on such great skin, and because you are now looking better and often look years younger, the beauty saboteur is not happy. They are damned if they are going to allow you to look better than them, so they start dripping their poison. This can involve mocking, teasing or slagging you off in public. Their mission is to bully and embarrass you to stop looking so damn good.

This is a warning not to over-share too easily when it comes to your beauty. The smart lady knows the art of keeping her business to herself.

LISTEN TO US, THE PROFESSIONALS

I will give you an example of what I often see in my clinic.

The new client has transformed her skin, is looking ten years younger from the facials and skin care plan, she is thrilled and excited and just can’t help herself and tells her friend.

That person might then come into the clinic and enquire about the costs and time and effort involved. Their mission is to chip away at the friend and be negative.

My advice is to keep your beauty secrets to yourself, it’s all confidential in my clinic and that is how you should keep your beauty regimes.

The smart lady knows to keep all her products discreet and out of sight too.

WHAT TO WATCH OUT FOR

Basically, the beauty saboteur is just jealous of how well you are doing. When I worked in the fitness industry, I saw this all the time too, so it’s not just in beauty. You get a client to the best shape and fitness of their life, and suddenly their friends or a sister or work colleague is telling them they’re too thin, they look gaunt, old, anything to get them back to how they were before, the same as them.

The evil eye is alive and well, and the saboteur is always on the prowl.

A lovely lady told me one time how she loved getting her hair blow-dried every week, and how her mother used do it too - it was her Friday ritual all her life.

One day, her daughter-in-law pointed out to her how it was such a waste of money and she should only be doing it for a special occasion, so she stopped her weekly blow dry.

That is exactly the kind of thing the saboteur does.

You should never stop doing anything you love or enjoy, even if someone else thinks it’s a waste of time or money. It’s not their money or head.

Life is so short, let them do and be whatever they love to enjoy, who is anyone to tell anyone else what they should be doing with their own money today?

The daughter-in-law won’t be long spending all that lady’s inheritance on her own hair, I can tell ya.

TOP TIPS TO AVOID A SABOTEUR

Do not say where you are going - to your beautician, hairdresser, gym, stylist, nail technician, personal trainer, or classes you do.

These should be kept private, and oversharing is what will draw the saboteur on you.

Make sure you do not display on your desk or pull out of you bag in public any beauty products you are using, and do not discuss what you use.

Never buy them a voucher for where you go, this is just an open invitation to ruin something you have enjoyed and loved so much.

KNOW YOUR VALUE

The high value woman has fantastic self-worth and self-respect, they wouldn’t ever be so rude or vulgar as to discuss money, price or cost.

They know they are worth every penny they are investing in themselves, and that it’s a smart investment because the return is clear to see in the mirror every day.

She can see how her skin is not wrinkling up or ageing from her regular facials and using the correct skin care products, and can see how her personalised skin care plan has been so impactful in slowing down her ageing process.

They always dress well, they do not declare out loud what shop they bought their clothes in or, worse again, how much it cost, they are elegant and classy in every sense.

They are positive and do not discuss bad news or bitch, moan and complain about anything they can.

They are grateful to be working with a beauty expert and getting the advice and great service.

I find the high value woman comes into her own at Christmas, she does not land in December and expect miracles. but knows the importance of keeping up the treatments and the home care regime all year round.

If you are reading this and you used to love going for your facials or beauty treatments, but stopped it because of a saboteur, I really hope you take it back up and get back to doing the things you once enjoyed.

Not everyone wants to see you looking your best - radiant, youthful, and glowing - so know your worth.

Emer O’Callaghan is a multi award winning beauty doctor and skin expert, and winner of Irish Beauty Therapist Of The Year, who works at Emarald Organic Beauty Products Ltd, trading as Emerald Beauty Clinic, 021 4365949, a Guinot Crown Elite Clinic and Dermalogica Centre of Excellence, 2008-2026, www.emeraldbeautyclinic.ie, follow us on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok.

SIX WEEK SKIN KICKSTART: Transform your skin in time for Christmas with our amazing six-week skin Kick- start plan, which includes three professional grade facials to remove dead, dull skin, a full skin analysis, and personalised home care skin plan. To book, call Emerald Beauty Clinic, 021 4365949. Appointments only, free parking for clients.