Julie Helen: 'It is difficult to describe the dread I feel around wheelchair accessibility in new places'

Ricky got called for a hearing test by the HSE after I highlighted a family history of deafness over a year ago at one of his last developmental checks.

I had noticed that sometimes he wouldn’t answer me if he was watching a screen. Of course, it could have been that he was purely distracted, but I figured that these standard checks are there for a reason and I’ll always do what I believe is best as a mum.

Anyway, I forgot about it all and we got on with our lives till the appointment came in the door.

I immediately felt a sense of panic. The Audiology department was in St Finbarr’s hospital and it came with a highlighted warning that parking in the area was very limited and attendees might need an extra 30 minutes to secure parking. I was sitting at the kitchen at home and my immediate instinct was to ask dad would he come with us?

The last time I was in the same location I was in school and going to my own orthodontics appointments and he was with me. He always had to drop me off at the door and then find parking further afield.

It is difficult to describe the dread I feel around wheelchair accessibility in new places. The fear I tend to attach to a new place is real and intense and founded in many past experiences of getting stuck or not being able to get in somewhere.

More than anything in the whole world, I do not want to pass the fear or the possibility of any restriction onto my son. I also want to feel able at the ripe old age of 39 not to have to ask either of my parents for help, especially when it comes to parenting. I didn’t ask dad when I opened the letter and it turned out he and mum were away on the day of the appointment so it pushed me to be confident in going solo.

On the morning, I explained to Ricky about the hearing test and he barely blinked as it is something he has heard about from his uncle Diarmuid plenty of times, and he loves a challenge, so he was up for it.

I calculated our timings to give us two hours where just over one hour appeared necessary. Taking time pressure out of the equation definitely helps me to navigate challenges with access if I need to. It wasn’t raining which was a huge bonus that made everything easier.

I find Ricky being confident and capable a massive help too because I can get the wheelchair out of the car and get sorted without any hassle. That of course hinged on actually getting a space.

When we arrived there were spaces parallel to the footpath, one behind the other. That type are not my favourite as sometimes there can be a lack of space behind the car, which makes me nervous about hitting the car behind me when I land the wheelchair on the ground, it’s not an exact science. On this occasion, I managed fine and we were met with a smooth surface and an automatic door at the entrance to the building, so we were flying it! We were super early and our appointment time rolled around. Ricky was a trooper in the test, responding with a confident “yes!” when he could hear a beep. The audiologist Laura was great with him and set him up for success. I’m so glad it all went well!