Just heartbroken to have lost a good, formidable friend

My friend Leigh Gath died suddenly last week. I am heartbroken.

When I sat down to write these words, I wanted to pay tribute to Leigh, a formidable disability advocate, one of the best I have ever met, but before I do that, I want to tell you that I will miss my friend, a lady who picked up the phone on a regular basis to check in about how I was, and how my family was. She was someone who truly understood all of the parts of me and didn’t give any undue weight to disability, which I really loved about her.

In every room I shared with Leigh, she was highly respected. When she spoke, people listened and acted after being inspired by her willingness to ask the hard questions. She was always one of the most capable people in the room and lifted the mood with her cheeky laugh, even when we were dealing with the most serious of subjects.

Leigh Gath was the first Confidential Recipient in Ireland, a role created when abuse of people with disabilities in Áras Attracta came to light. The role gave people who lived in HSE-funded services a place to turn. In her eight years in the role which was independent of the HSE, she fought hard for the rights of people whose voice was rarely heard. I was lucky to work with her - we were working towards the same thing, equality and the realisation of rights for all. It was second nature to Leigh and I learned so much from her over the years. She was constantly going, thinking of the next campaign or the next angle to gather and mobilise people so that society would understand disability rights in a concrete and human way.

As a thalidomide survivor, Leigh told her story with great practicality. She could do everything, and if things got challenging she had the most incredible network of people to call on. In recent times, it became clear I was an important member of her network and I can’t think of a bigger compliment or privilege. To be around such a force of goodness always felt like I was in the right place.

Tributes have been paid and will be paid by people far more important than me from all over the world. I think a lovely thing about Leigh was that she made every single person she met feel important and valued. She would call out injustice in a direct way and revert back to her genuine, signature kindness within minutes. That was an incredible skill. She was the kind of advocate I hope to be. I will remember her mentorship with great fondness forever.

Many will have known Leigh as an advocate but I was extra fortunate to have her in my tribe as fellow wife and mother.

Leigh and Eugene recently celebrated 20 years of marriage. They were a phenomenal team and their love radiated strongly when you were in their company. My thoughts are with Eugene this week and I know he will greet us all with great dignity in remembering his beloved wife.

A stand-out conversation with Leigh I had was in 2017, when I worried I’d never become a mum as a disabled woman. Leigh chuckled and promised me that if she could, I could, and she shared her stories of motherhood with a generosity I will never forget. She became my cheerleader during pregnancy and when Ricky was born. Her children, Karl and Aisling, were and will always remain the apple of her eye. Rest in Peace, Leigh.