Life after breast cancer diagnosis: Full of ‘What ifs’ and ‘what nows’...

KAREN O’Byrne was diagnosed with breast cancer on March 22, 2021, during the Covid-19 pandemic.

“Life was good, despite Covid restrictions meaning we couldn’t mix with people, but we live in the countryside and embraced the situation,” she says.

“Our two children (aged 14 and 15) had adapted to homeschooling, and regular runs with Jim (my husband) kept me fit,” adds Karen.

“In February, 2021, I found a lump while showering - it seemed to appear overnight and was easy to feel. I checked it daily for a couple of weeks in case it disappeared. It didn’t.

“On March 8, I saw my GP. Three days later I was in the CUH for a mammogram, ultrasound and biopsy. Covid meant Jim, my husband, was pacing outside the hospital.”

Karen received her diagnosis.

“On March 22, I was diagnosed with Stage 2 IDC Hormone Receptive breast cancer. Surgery was booked, and I would then need radiotherapy and long-term hormone treatment. My surgeon said I was lucky to have found it early, which was very reassuring.”

How did she feel?

“I remember feeling numb inside, but calm, we had a plan and would get through this,” says Karen.

She had to break the news to her children.

“It was very tough telling the kids, but we were factual. We focused on the positives – it could be removed and I would be checked regularly. They were understandably upset and scared so talking openly with them was important.

“On April 12, I had a wide local excision and sentinel node biopsy - I became overwhelmed in the operating theatre. I actually had cancer!”

Karen was in for a further shock.

“Two weeks later, my surgeon advised the tumour was a grade 3 and had been sent for Oncotype testing to determine whether chemo was needed, which was a complete shock to us.

“On May 13, we met my Oncology team. The Oncotype score was high and 16 chemo sessions were planned - four AC then 12 weekly Taxol sessions. I had been strong up to now, but this wasn’t on our plan.”

The next day, the HSE was hit by a cyber-attack, and for a few weeks there was silence, which was incredibly hard.

Then Karen began her treatment.

“On June 11, chemo started. It was tough but I took all my meds, injected myself and just got on with it. My long hair was shaved short when it started falling out and I embraced the new look.

“I reacted to the taxol so they changed me to Abraxane, which I actually found harder. Radiotherapy followed and was completed in December, 2021. A fall down the stairs added to the drama of it all with an ambulance trip to A&E.

“Just after Christmas, I started on Anastrazole medication. This was changed to Exemestane, which I am able to tolerate slightly better.”

“Jim and the kids have been a fantastic support - I know they felt helpless at times but they underestimate how much they helped me!”

She took things in her stride.

“I believe in positive thinking, so the four of us joked around and laughed when others might not. Many people turned their backs on us which was shocking, but it made us even more thankful to those who stuck by us.

“My family and oldest friends are in the UK, but the friends who sat in our garden or joined us at the beach, the weekly Zoom calls with my parents and constant texts from people (particularly on chemo days) made a huge difference to what was a very lonely journey for us all. Karen didn’t see her family for a long time.

“It was three years before we saw my family and UK friends due to Covid and my diagnosis, which made a tough time even more difficult. My low immune system meant the kids had rarely even seen their friends so to finally hug other people was overwhelming.”

Jim stepped up to the plate.

“Jim is my rock. He balanced working, running the home and being my taxi driver, and continues to support me every day. It must have been tough for him to drop me at the hospital doors each week.

“Jim took me to the beach regularly as I have always found the sound of the sea therapeutic – it was extremely calming, particularly during chemo, as I felt at peace.”

Sometimes, things were tough.

“Ironically, this year has been tougher than last,” says Karen.

“People see your hair growing back and think you are fine, but the changes physically and emotionally are unseen by many. Your body is weak, you look and feel different, question who you are, and worry about the ‘what ifs’ and wonder ‘what now’?

“Side-effects from meds and repercussions from the treatment mean I am currently restricted in what I can do.

“Losing a good friend to secondary cancer recently also hit me hard, but she embraced life with strength and humour, and I intend to keep doing the same.

“I have taken up sea swimming, which enables me to exercise and also clears my head.”

Karen found more support.

“I did a lot of online research after being diagnosed, and that’s how I found Cork Arc Support House, attending an online webinar about hormone treatment, which was very informative.

“The feeling of loss after finishing chemo was huge - I had felt safe at the hospital. So I phoned Cork Arc House and had my first individual counselling session.

“Cork Arc House have provided vital support to me - I have continued with counselling and also taken part in Thai Chi, Yoga and Ladies Who Launch (kayaking sessions run by Kinsale Outdoor Education Centre) which have improved my balance and confidence.

“When Arc house opened up again in January, 2022, I started group sessions with other ladies who have a breast cancer diagnosis. The house provides a calm and safe environment where you can relax. It was the first time I’d sat in front of people and actually spoken about my journey, which was surreal. It was like I’d been hidden for a year and now I could be seen.

“I have met some wonderful women through Cork Arc House who I would now consider good friends – we have a lot of laughs but also support each other. These ladies, Arc House, my friends, family and of course Jim and the kids and my medical team are invaluable in my continuing recovery and future happiness.”

To contact Cork Arc Cancer Support House see https://corkcancersupport.ie/

ANOTHER WOMAN’S STORY

Anne Dolan, from Fermoy, feared she wouldn’t live to see her grandchildren grow up when she received a shock cancer diagnosis in 2010.

“My cancer journey began in October, 2010, when I went for a routine mammogram at Breastcheck Cork,” says Anne.

“I was diagnosed a week later with breast cancer. I had a lumpectomy three weeks later at CUH, in November, 2016, started eight sessions of chemo in January, 2017, then 15 sessions of radiotherapy In April of that year.

“I am now in remission and am taking Tamoxifen for 10 years.”

The diagnosis was an awful worry to Anne.

“After losing my two brothers Tommy and Donie Lynch to cancer, in 1997 and 2004 respectively, it was tough news to come to terms with,” says Anne.

“It was an awful worry when I got it because I thought, ‘Oh my God here we go again,’ But thankfully it was a good outcome for me.

“The family were devastated in 1997 when our brother / son Tommy Lynch, was given a terminal diagnosis of spinal cancer, and then again in 2004, when our brother / son Donie was also given a terminal diagnosis of bowel cancer, it was very hard, especially on our elderly Mother, Hannah.

“When my own diagnosis came through in 2016, my daughter Tara was expecting our first grandchild, a beautiful little girl called Ellie, when I got the bad news, I didn’t know if I’d be around to meet her. She is five now, and is the love of my life. It was such a terrifying time for me, not knowing if I’d be around to see the little child grow up,” recalls Anne, who thankfully came through the experience in 2016 to be told the following year that she was cancer-free.

“We have since had another grandchild, a little boy called Thomas, who is the apple of my eye. I’m determined to see both my grandchildren grow up,” says Anne.

“They bring a ray of sunshine into our lives every day.”

Anne’s diagnosis took its toll on her close family who supported her fully.

“My diagnosis had an awful effect on my three children, the uncertainty of it, also my two amazing sisters, Catherine and Maura, who were there for me, every step of the way, also my in-laws, who were so supportive,” says Anne.

“My husband Kevin and I were running our own business, a catering company, in a secondary school, in Fermoy, when I got the call to attend a routine mammogram, at the age of 54, my second one ever. Because we were only a small business, I found it a nuisance, to take time off, during school term, to attend the mammogram in Cork, but now I am so glad that I did, because five and a half years later, I am here to tell the tale, thank God.

“My Oncologist, Professor Seamus O Reilly, is a caring, compassionate man, I will be forever grateful to him. My GP Carol Collins, of Fermoy, was a great support too, I used to see her every two weeks while I was on chemo to have a bone marrow injection the day after chemo.”

Anne was in good hands.

“I had all my chemo sessions at the South Infirmary Hospital, Cork, the staff there were amazing, especially my nurse Jackie, and the fabulous tea lady Janice, who put a smile on my face, every time, when I was at my lowest.”

Cancer takes its toll on the body.

“I lost all my hair after the second chemo session, and that was very hard,” says Anne.

“I then had radiotherapy sessions at CUH, again the staff there put you at your ease, they honestly can’t do enough for you.

“I also used the services at the Daffodil Centre, at CUH, where they put me forward for a ‘Look Good, Feel Better’ programme, a fantastic service, where professional MUAs come in, show you how to apply make-up, and make you feel good about yourself, particularly after losing your hair.”

Anne is now out the other side. “My long term effect from having the treatment is having stiff joints, but it’s a small price to pay.

“Both my husband and I moved house in 2021, from Fermoy to the beautiful town of Killarney in Kerry, we now live near our daughter / grandchildren, and it’s a blessing to see them most days.

“My message to get out there is, please, please if you are called for your mammogram, don’t be afraid, more than likely you will have a good result, and if there is cancer present, and it is caught early, you will get the best of treatment, and you are stronger than you think, you WILL get through.”

To learn more about the signs of breast cancer and how to check yourself, visit cancer.ie/careforyourpair.

You can also contact the Irish Cancer Support Line on 1800 200 700.