Cork businesswoman felt 'immense career pressure' when she became a stay-at-home mum

Melissa Clarke admits to feeling ‘immense pressure’ that she was falling behind in her career when she chose to be a stay-at-home mum.

Melissa, who was born in Devon and grew up in Perth, had been working in press offices for theatres and arts festivals and UK national charities including Comic Relief, Battersea Dogs & Cats Home, and Age UK.

“But the pressures on working mums, especially somewhere like London where we were living at the time, made it hard to continue the grind when we had kids, with childcare costs, long commutes, train delays - you name it!” she said.

“Don’t get me wrong, I loved staying at home with the kids, and I’m so grateful I could for those early years, but there was always a feeling of how and when will I ever get back into employment, and especially to jump back into a career that I had worked so hard to be in, but now with two kids to look after.

“The long hours, commuting and working like you don’t have children was never going to work for me, so there was immense pressure that I felt that I didn’t have it all, and was somehow falling behind, while my peers were progressing,” she admits.

What once worried her actually led to a solution that worked out far better than expected. She’s now running her own PR business in her adopted home of Clonakilty, even if it was never part of her plan.

“Setting up my business in 2023 was only truly possible, I think, by moving to West Cork in 2022, and especially Clonakilty, as the community have been so welcoming and instrumental to igniting my career again after nearly five years of not working while raising our young kids in London,” said Melissa.

“Covid hit, and like everyone else, we were reassessing our life. We were also needed back in Cork as my husband’s mother’s health was badly deteriorating, so we made the decision to move to Clonakilty to be closer to her and to friends that live in Cork, as my husband had grown up and studied in Cork city,” she said.

It was only through her involvement in a fundraising campaign for a new playground in the West Cork town that Melissa got a taste for how she could utilise her PR background, and she has never looked back since.

“I became heavily involved in community fundraising and local events, where I then used my PR skills to help organisations and businesses promote themselves more effectively. That experience sparked the idea of starting my own PR business and to provide strategic support for local businesses in raising their profile whilst also creating a career that worked around family life.

“Running my own business allowed me to balance work with childcare responsibilities, avoid the high costs of childcare, and build flexible working hours that suit both my family and my clients,” she said.

“I love working with my clients, really getting to know them and understanding their PR needs, whilst providing them with solutions, strategies and guidance in their projects and events. I enjoy the diversity with my clients, and I get the best of both worlds as I’m not stuck in the same place every week.

“I can be working on large-scale community events and also with food producers and hospitality clients, alongside artists, health and wellbeing, and a great selection of entrepreneurs and business owners across West Cork, and in Cork city. There is so much creativity in the clients and jobs I’ve had, and there is always more that can be achieved. Especially in a new world of AI and misinformation, my role as a credible storyteller is far more important than ever in gaining audiences’ trust in a brand, person, campaign or event,” she said.

Running her own business naturally brought some new challenges, but overall, it has been positive.

“Being self-employed means I get to work hours that suit my family’s needs, as well as my own, and gives me so much creative freedom that can be harder whilst working within many layers in an organisation.

“My children also get to see a different way of working than what I was used to growing up.

“On the flip side, I had only ever been employed and understood how that all worked. I had no idea about tax returns and the rest of it, but my experiences did help me to understand the importance of networking and promoting myself, so that all came quite naturally.

“What I wasn’t prepared for was having to ask for money to work, it was always something that was decided by someone else through a hiring process, and managed by another department, so the admin side of things, pitching my value and worth, took a bit of time to get used to.”

Melissa joined Network Ireland West Cork at the end of 2024, and was approached to join the committee as Public Relations Officer the same month.

“It’s been a fantastic experience, and while being on the committee has brought me wonderful connections and learnings, being a member of a Network Ireland branch is like finding your tribe. It can be a daunting and lonely experience leaving employment to start out alone – I was learning as I was going along in my new business and the support, encouragement, and friendly welcome is everything you need in those early years. I don’t think I could imagine not being a member now!”

What was it like to win the award for Emerging New Businesswoman of the Year for the West Cork branch?

“It’s one thing to know how to do your job, but running a business is unlike anything I’ve ever had to experience. So winning was an absolute honour, and I am hugely proud of myself for pushing myself through those harder days, of nearly giving up while juggling the demands of being a parent and starting out in a new town, country even!

“It is great recognition and the boost I needed to allow myself to accept that I am able to follow this through and keep on building a sustainable business.”