Dr Michelle O'Driscoll: How can carers care for themselves 

Next week is National Carers Week - seven days of paying tribute to those who dedicate themselves to looking after others that require their support.

For some, it’s a long-term role, maybe for a family member with a disability or chronic condition. For others, it’s a brief but intense period of time catapulted into the role when somebody gets suddenly sick and reliant on their care.

Caring roles can include the physical daily needs of somebody, as well as handling the logistical requirements of navigating the complex healthcare system on their behalf.

Some carers are mothers or fathers, siblings or children, in-laws or cousins. Others are a neighbour or friend who has stepped in to help. Most have other responsibilities too, which may include their own jobs, family, and even their own medical conditions.

The pressure that comes with keeping the ‘show on the road’ as somebody’s carer, and ensuring that your loved one receives the support they need, shouldn’t be underestimated.

This week of recognition seeks to signpost the supports and services that can help, and to raise awareness of all that carers do in our society for the most vulnerable.

Here are some things to think about actioning or asking for, to support your role as a carer.

1. Connect with others

Many people aren’t currently navigating the journey of caring for somebody, but rest assured that many others are and you’re not alone in this. Connecting with these people online or locally in-person can bring relief and comfort in feeling seen, understood and in good company. They will fully understand the physical, mental, financial and emotional toll that this role takes, as well as the rewarding aspects that you experience. Having somebody to chat to at times when you feel that others just don’t understand is invaluable.

2. Take care of your own health

Self-care sounds cheesy, idealistic, and even selfish at the best of times, particularly when you’ve got somebody else relying on you. Where are you supposed to find the time to go for a run, make your own health appointment, play music, or anything else so frivolous?

But ironically, looking after yourself is one of the most important things you can do for your loved one. Finding the drive to keep going, the energy to keep advocating, and the reserves to overcome the most recent challenges or setbacks on their behalf all require you to invest that time in your own wellbeing.

3. Organisation is key

Appointments, medications, support services, contact details, all of this information is vital for the smooth provision of care to somebody, who is often themselves too unwell to manage it themselves. Setting up a system you and/or they can navigate relatively easily will make life more manageable for all, and will ensure that they receive the healthcare they need, when they need it. With the impending electronic health record system, this should become even slightly more streamlined, but for now it’s strongly advisable to create a file with any relevant letters, a medication list with the key information about each one, a calendar with upcoming appointments, and even perhaps a notebook with the main information conveyed at each appointment.

4. Communicate with doctors and healthcare staff

It can feel daunting to ask questions at an appointment, or to feel like you’re taking up extra time in a healthcare setting, but it’s in everybody’s interest for you to ask the questions needed to clarify anything that you’re uncertain of about your loved ones.

5. Know your rights

Your contribution as a carer is invaluable to society, and you should seek to be supported accordingly. There are opportunities to avail of grants, allowances, tax benefits and medical cards in certain situations, and full eligibility can be explored with Citizen’s Information.

This isn’t always something that will be flagged to you, and while it may drop to the end of a long to-do list, it could be worth your while to follow up on this.

6. Seek support

It can be easy to become the default caregiver in a family unit, and this might well be what suits and works best in your situation. However, it’s not sustainable to be the only person involved in all aspects of care.

Don’t be afraid to call a meeting where relevant to discuss caring arrangements, and/or to call in specific contributions where needed. Often, it’s not until you clearly outline what’s required that others feel able to help.

In the case where you don’t have any other support to call on, or indeed in addition to family support, do consider respite support where available to give yourself a breather and the opportunity to regroup before taking up the mantle of caring responsibility again.

Finally, give yourself huge credit for the job you’re doing, the love you’re sharing and the impact you’re having on somebody’s life.

It’s probably the toughest job there is, and you deserve for it to be recognised in all the ways outlined above.

More information can be found at www.carersweek.ie/resources