Cork Views: A summer job will teach your teen much about life

The school yearis drawing to a close – for many parents this is a relief. No more getting kids out of bed for school, rushed breakfasts, traffic jams, worries about grades, missing homework, lost lunches, unwashed uniforms, angst-ridden presentations and heart-skipping teacher’s notes about hidden potential.

Now your older teen has months of summer ahead with nothing to do. Too old for summer camps, too young for independent travel, so how to occupy those long summer days? Teens have worked hard all year and many need time to relax, catch up on sleep, and have downtime with nothing to do.

But three months? Parents, out working all day will worry. Are they lying on their beds with curtains still closed scrolling through social media? Are they sprawled on the couch, with bowls of breakfast cereal playing video games? Where are they when they’re not on the couch? Who are they meeting? Are they getting into trouble or engaging in risky behaviours? When you check up on them, why won’t they answer their phone?

How can they use the summer to rest and recuperate but also learn skills that will teach them to be responsible adults that can fend for themselves in an increasingly chaotic world?

When I was in school, summer camps didn’t really exist, and jobs were hard to come by.

My first job was in the kitchen of the local private hospital. Washing saucepans, scrubbing the floor twice a day, cleaning the cooker and general skivvy. By the end of the summer, I had progressed to making salad dishes for tea and became a dab hand at separating egg whites for pavlovas.

My blow-in summer position was not fully appreciated by some long-term kitchen hands – one of whom chased me around the kitchen with a carving knife. Only the rapid intervention of a chef who had seen it all before saved me from permanent harm.

I remember the pride I felt at clearing the mountain of pots, only to be immediately replaced by another one; the camaraderie at the kitchen table over lunch; and the heady feeling that came with the miserly sum in my weekly paycheck.

Another summer was spent buying second-hand furniture and bringing it back to its former glory. With no carpentry skills, I had to be careful. My favourite item was unloved Victorian side tables that I could strip down to the bare wood and slowly French polish into life. An elderly aunt would place an ad, position the finished piece in her drawing room, and demonstrate remarkable sales pitches to her unwary victims. One of those unsold tables sits in my front porch, its twisted oak legs reminding me of my early entrepreneurial and restoration skills.

Several decades later, a teenage son spent a summer selling off all the unwanted gadgets in the house – surf boards, a table tennis table, a dolls’ house. His older brother spent two years looking for missing golf clubs before the truth came out.

Summer months are the ideal time to redecorate. I remember weeks spent up ladders, hanging wallpaper, painting ceilings and waiting for gloss paint to dry. Listening to the radio, taking coffee breaks, and watching as bedrooms and bathrooms were transformed from world weary to spit spot. The smell of fresh paint and wallpaper paste still brings me back to those carefree summer days.

Another option is inveigling your way into odd jobs for neighbours. Mowing lawns, weeding, walking the dog, ironing, babysitting. Endless opportunities that come with a good income and lots of coffee, tea, and biscuits.

One of the best jobs teens can get is dealing directly with the public. My first experience on a hospital ward was as tea lady – hauling the trolley with a piping tea urn and boxes of Marietta biscuits to new mums with their tiny babies in a cot beside them.

There was something about that hospital environment – all hope and new life and order mixed with a large dollop of drama - it was the first step on a ladder of hospital care that followed me for decades.

But I never held a job that involved directly dealing with the public every minute of the day. Years later, both my daughters held jobs in retail and hospitality. Long hours on their feet, dealing with fussy, irate, demanding customers. There is ‘nothing as funny as folk’ my grandmother used to say. Dealing with people – whether they are colleagues or customers - is often the trickiest parts of any job.

One daughter, on her first day in a restaurant, tipped a jug of gravy on a customer’s lap, spilled wine down a white dress and tripped over the doorstop with two plates of spaghetti. Another worked in a shoe shop, learning to deal with elderly ladies picking out their sandals by trying on every choice in the shop and walking away with none.

Both taught me a lesson about dealing with retail staff. Be pleasant in a restaurant, say please and thank-you, and the same in a shop. Rather than berate the server, if you have an issue, politely ask for the manager.

Experience as a waitress meant that dinner tables at home are set with precision. One son, who worked in a bookshop learnt to spot a shoplifter from 200 yards. Another key skill is the art of always looking busy – even when there is absolutely nothing to do.

In a virtual world, where followers and likes determine status, a summer job can be a major confidence booster. Performing tasks successfully, getting feedback from supervisors, and solving problems on your own all contribute to a growing sense of independence.

Even small achievements – dealing with awkward or nasty customers, standing up for yourself without lashing out or being rude, or mastering a new skill - can have a lasting impact on self- esteem.

Earning your own income teaches young people a lesson no textbook can replicate. When teens have to pay for their night out, they quickly learn the value of money.

This summer, rather than allow the house to descend into a sea of unwashed dishes and bored teens sprawled on the couch, encourage them to come up with a scheme to keep themselves occupied, learn new skills, deal with the public and manage their finances – lessons that will gain their independence, boost their confidence, and last a lifetime.