Gender reveal parties are becoming so popular, but are they a bit... cringe?

“MUST be a generational thing...” I find myself saying these words quite regularly at the moment – is it a sign of middle age? Feeling out of touch with how the younger generation thinks or behaves?

The most recent time I found myself muttering the above under my breath, was when I clicked onto a series of videos on gender reveals.

God knows why I clicked in the first place, but once I had seen the first video - you know yourself - I just had to continue watching until the very end.

Gender reveals seem to be a relatively new phenomenon here in Ireland. At least they were not on my radar in the past decade when I gave birth to my two girls (whose gender was only revealed when they popped into the world, kicking and screaming).

For those who may not know – a gender reveal is an event/party/announcement which is recorded/photographed and shared on social media by a couple who are expecting a baby. Sometimes it is done among family and friends, but usually the event is shared online – with some videos clocking up thousands of views.

Actually, the most watched ‘gender reveal’ video on YouTube has 32 million views – there’s an actual Guinness World Book of Records for it! It featured Dubai influencers who lit up the Burj Khalifa blue to reveal they were having a baby boy.

There is also a record for the most views of a gender reveal party in 24 hours – that title went to a couple in the USA.

Usually, during a gender reveal something either pink or blue is revealed – and the cat is out of the bag on whether you are having a boy or a girl. There have been controversies over this gender stereotype use of colours for male and female, denoting a boy and girl – but that’s another column altogether!

As I already mentioned, we didn’t find out the sex of either of our babies – it’s a personal decision. I can totally see the practicalities of finding out – so you can be prepared, especially if it is baby number two or three. But the magic for me was not knowing – and after those 40 weeks, having the big reveal on their actual arrival (after hours of labour!) was the most magical of moments – I don’t think a gender reveal would have equalled that.

But each to their own!

However – gender reveals just make me cringe.

So where did this all originate and why has it become the norm?

They originated back in the 2000s in the USA, but the trend has become really popular worldwide of late – thanks to the rise and rise of social media – do a quick search on YouTube, Instagram and Pinterest, and most recently TikTok, and there are thousands of ideas and examples.

I’m still trying to figure out how it all happens – but in some way a third party is given the information after a scan and they keep it secret from the parents, until the gender reveal party.

The first ever gender reveal is said to have included a cake – but nowadays it seems some eggs, flour and a bit of coloured icing just won’t cut the mustard. Instead, they are more flamboyant - think paint fight gender reveals, or you can draw sparkles in the night sky with ‘boy’ or ‘girl’, or set off some confetti canons.

One I found hard to understand was a WWE gender reveal – this involved two men, yes grown-up men, dressed in pink and blue adult baby grows, wrestling. The winner of the wrestling match (who was dressed in blue – revealed to the happy expectant couple looking on that they were having a boy.)

There are also some other options, such as a bath bomb gender reveal... (I’m honestly not sure what that involves, surely not an audience!).

There there is a pinata reveal, gender reveal candles, scratch cards, or lightsabers gender reveals! ‘I am your Father....!’

If I am struggling what to make of it all, I wondered what the generation before me would make of it. I am thinking in particular of my grandmother, who gave birth to her first borns, (twins, I might add), at home, most likely without electricity, definitely without medical help, and kept the tiny little things in shoe boxes in her dressing drawer, to keep them snug and warm – no hospital incubators there! I can only imagine the reaction if she saw one of these gender reveal videos.

Don’t get me wrong – I loved a good baby shower, as much as any expectant mum – but gender reveals are a little bit more ‘showy off’, dare I say. We are living in a TikTok, Insta saturated world.

Don’t get me started on the gender reveals that went wrong – the videos of the siblings crying because they don’t want a sister, or brother. (The parents really didn’t think that one through!) Or the dads who have disappointment written all over their faces when pink bursts out to show ‘it’s a girl’... and they walk off in a huff (like, come on!).

Any baby, no matter what gender, should be loved, welcomed, and definitely not a ‘disappointment’.

Then there are gender reveals gone wrong on a serious level … which have caused explosions, water pollution, and plane crashes.

Some incidents even ended in deaths, yes, you read that right. Maybe it’s wise to stick to the traditional baby showers after all!