Cork attack victim: ‘I feared my child wouldn’t recognise me’

A FATHER of three has opened up about fears his young child would not recognise him after a corrosive liquid attack that resulted in him losing an eye.

Francis Costello, from Ballyphehane, was speaking to The Echo in the wake of a terrifying assault inflicted by a man in a relationship with Francis’ ex-partner.

Francis found himself plunged into a nightmare after a knock on the door changed his life forever.

It led to a guilty plea from John Paul Carey at Cork Circuit Criminal Court to the most significant charge of assault causing serious harm as well as assaults on two other parties on the same occasion.

Carey was previously living in Glanmire, Cork, and in Dunmanus Crescent in Knocknaheeny, Cork.

Tensions had been mounting between the pair in the weeks leading up to the horror attack which occurred around 9pm on March 4, 2022, at the home where Francis resides in Ballyphehane.

Francis, who was an innocent party, recalled seeing Carey standing there to greet him with what looked like a bottle of water. Before he knew it, he was on the floor wishing for death amid unbearable agony.

A year and a half later, the Ballyphehane man admits one of the most difficult parts of his experience was concerns about his children.

He recalled the fear and anxiety that consumed him before reuniting with his now-four-year-old son for the first time since the incident. Luckily, those feelings dissipated quickly, giving way to the happiest moment Francis has experienced since that traumatic night.

“I missed his whole three-year-old life as a result of the attack,” Francis told The Echo.

“When I saw him I wasn’t sure he would remember me. The idea filled me with anxiety. As soon as he saw me he walked towards me and put his hands around my neck before putting his head on my shoulder and saying: ‘Daddy, I missed you’.”

The moment inspired Francis at a very low time.

“I lost everything, including the will to live,” he said.

“I wanted to take my own life. If I didn’t have my kids, I don’t know if I would still be here.”

The surreal night still plays on his mind as he finds himself unable to awake from the nightmare. He recalled the explicit details with chilling clarity.

“My two brothers were home with me that night. We were sitting in the front room watching the darts and having a few drinks when there was a knock at the door.”

The image of Carey standing in the doorway has become ingrained in his mind.

“Next thing I knew I was on the ground screaming in pain. While all this was happening, he was kicking and punching me.”

Francis’ two brothers, Roy and John, found themselves caught in the crossfire, and Francis thanks his lucky stars their injuries were not life-changing.

“I remember screaming and roaring in pain. I’ll never forget the burning in my face, my eyes and my head. I couldn’t confirm what type of chemical it was. All I knew was that the suffering was bad enough to make me want to die in pain. I remember my brothers coming out and asking what was going on. I could hear the screaming. I just couldn’t see.”

The emergency services were soon at the scene.

“It was chaotic. The fire service and paramedics were there and we were being treated in our front garden. I don’t know if people were coming out of their houses because it was really difficult to understand what was going on around me.

“The Fire Service were hosing us down with cooling spray. We were in our underwear to make sure there were no chemicals left on our bodies before we got into the ambulance. I don’t remember the clothes being taken off me, but I assume they were cut off.”

He described the surge of rage he experienced during those bizarre moments.

“I remember screaming out his name and address while I was being treated and saying: ‘Go up and get him now’,” he said in reference to the man responsible.

While Roy’s injuries were minor enough to avoid hospital, John was not so lucky.

“We were transferred to CUH where they made us comfortable for the night,” says Francis.

“I knew I was in trouble in that there was no vision in my left eye. My emotions were all over the place. I just remember turning to my brother in the ambulance and asking if he was alright. I was more worried for my family than I was for myself in that moment.

“It was really difficult to look at my brother and see him like that.”

The overwhelming terror continued for Francis in the days that followed.

“The thought of having a shower terrified me,” he confessed.

“I still remembered the pain of the water hitting my face and I didn’t want to go through that again.”

Francis was later transferred to the South Infirmary Victoria University Hospital.

“When I got [there], it was the first time I actually looked in the mirror. I saw my face destroyed and a very sick eye. Shaving was particularly difficult because I didn’t want to look in the mirror for long. Even in the moment when it happened, I knew my eye was gone. However, at the same time there were a lot of procedures carried out in the following months to try and save it.”

Francis praised the frontline workers who took care of him during his darker days.

“I thought I wouldn’t get through it. Even when the nurses came in to take my blood pressure, I found myself breaking down into tears. There was no way of hiding the trauma.

“They were applying cream to my face and head every hour for two weeks. Without that care, I don’t think my face would have ever healed to the extent it has today.”

Medical professionals persevered unsuccessfully to save Francis’s eye.

“It was confirmed in the summer there was no more could be done and they would have to remove my eye. When the doctor told me I needed to have the surgery, I cried.”

It was the little things that restored the 41-year-old’s hope.

“I remember receiving a letter in the post addressed to me and my brother from somebody who read about what happened to us. There was a prayer and two miraculous medals inside were sellotaped to a piece of cardboard.”

Francis held on to the note as a keepsake, and the wording has stayed with him.

“I am a native of Cork and a regular Sunday World reader,” the letter read.

“I am horrified about what happened to you. I hope you get well soon.”

He said the gesture touched him deeply.

“I’m not religious, but at the same time I believe there is someone looking down on me. The letter really touched me. I’ll probably never have the chance to meet this woman, but I hope she’s well.”

This wasn’t the only time his family were blessed with the kindness of strangers.

“My dad went to the shop one day and bought groceries that came to €50,” Francis explained. “A girl in the shop insisted on paying for them, knowing the difficult circumstances we were in. People really do care. Family, friends and neighbours all reached out to me in different ways. Even though what happened to me scarred me physically, emotionally, and mentally, I can still see the good in people.”

However, fear and anxiety have become unwelcome bedfellows for the 41-year-old.

“There were nights where I went to bed and didn’t want to wake up in the morning. To this day, when I put my head to the pillow there are so many thoughts that go through my mind. All of them are to do with that night".

“Whatever sentence was handed to the person who did this would not have impacted me, because there is nothing that can ever replace what I lost. My life has been changed forever. Even though I might seem together now, there’s an emptiness and void in my life I don’t think I’ll ever be able to fill. I am very proud that I didn’t take my own life even though I’ve thought about it on more than one occasion.”

Francis said that he often felt wracked with guilt for the way his family suffered.

“My father was out for his couple of pints the night it happened. That’s one thing I’m grateful for. Mum passed away a few years ago after being sick for three and a half years. In a way, I’m glad she wasn’t here to see this happen.

“Mum was a very strong person who fought a three-and-a-half-year battle with cancer. I believe I got her resilience, and this is where my inner strength comes from. I have blamed myself a lot because of what my brothers went through. However, I know at the back of my mind that nobody could have ever predicted this was going to happen. What [Carey] did was inhumane. I feel for my family because family is very important to me. A part of me is grateful that I was the one who suffered these life-changing injuries and not them.”

While he’s grateful to be alive, life is an uphill battle.

“It’s a miracle I’m here just to talk about the impact of the trauma that turned my life upside down. I try to put on a brave face, but I don’t think I’ll ever be the same.

“Sometimes I forget, but there are reminders every morning. As soon as I look in the mirror to brush my teeth in the morning, I see what he did to me. He took an awful lot from me that night, but he didn’t take my personality.”

The Cork man said there were nights he feared Carey would return to “finish the job”.

“I suppose there is always that bit of fear,” he confessed.

“There are nights when I double lock the door. I believe he visited the house to fully blind me. I was only centimetres away from that happening. My fight for justice was for me and my family. Obviously, there was some level of fear he would get bail and come back and finish the job.”

Francis said he does not believe the 36-year-old attacker experienced any remorse for what he did.

“It’s difficult for me to accept that kind of an apology because I don’t believe there is any sincerity in his letter. The torture he put me through didn’t stop after the night he called to my house. I have been a hospital outpatient and inpatient since this started. I still have medical issues. There have been trips to High Court to give evidence so I could be sure that he wasn’t getting out. His guilty plea came a little late for me.”

Francis was determined to stay strong during that tumultuous period, however.

“What drove me on was representing my family. He brought harm on my family, and that was what made me most angry.”

The 41-year-old is hopeful that surgery to facilitate a prosthetic eye fitting will be a success.

“I travelled to Dublin to have the eye socket seen to. Because I got the eye removed there was no room for an implant. The tissue damage was too severe because of all the chemicals. This surgery would mean I could get fitted for a prosthetic eye, which would make a huge difference to my confidence. A consultant said they will be able to do surgery on me in the new year, but there’s only a 50/50 chance it will work. They will have to take tissue from the back of my mouth and stitch it to my socket. However, it’s not certain yet that it will hold.

“A prosthetic eye would really help my self-esteem. My confidence has been shattered. Sometimes I don’t talk about what happened because I feel like people think I should be over this now. You might say I’m doing other people’s thinking for them, but sometimes that’s hard to avoid.”

Seeing other people succeed has been a source of inspiration for Francis.

“I got joy from other people’s good news, because I didn’t have much in my own life. Today, I feel like there’s definitely hope. I believe I will get through this and that there’s a reason I’m still here. I just have to find out what that reason is.”

Francis’s brother Roy has set up a GoFundMe account to raise funds for Francis’s travel, living, and medical expenses as he prepares for surgery early next year which would allow him to be fitted with a prosthetic eye.

To donate and find out more visit gofundme.