'It is a record for my grandchildren': Cork man with dementia pens story of his life

Sitting in the sunshine at Springfort Hall in Mallow with cheerful, chatty Charlie Drake and his wife Ellen, it is hard to imagine he is 81 years old and has dementia.

Reading his recently launched book, My Life, My Story, My Way, that documents Charlie’s amazing, varied life, it is clear he is an accomplished historian and writer, having already published an in-depth account of the Clonbanin Ambush in North Cork, and helping to make a documentary about the historical event.

How did Charlie, dad to seven children, get an invitation to Áras an Uachtaráin to present President Higgins and his wife Sabina with a copy of the book about the ambush?

“It was one hell of a task!” says Charlie laughing. “I had tried without success to get an invitation to the President’s home. While I got lovely replies, I got nowhere.”

Then he met Michael and Sabina Higgins in the middle of nowhere.

“I had a chance meeting with the couple on a dangerous bend on the Ring of Beara in West Cork,” recalls Charlie. “Mrs Higgins let down the window and said, ‘You are in a dangerous place, back up a bit.”

Charlie always one to grab every opportunity, told the President he knew all about his mother and father and about the part they both played in the War of Independence.

“We exchanged pleasantries, and I told them about the book,” says Charlie. “The President asked if he could get a copy and I took the bull by the horns and said myself and the ambush committee would love to come to the Áras and present the book to him personally,” says Charlie.

“I explained that I had already tried through his staff”.

“Don’t mind them,” the President said. “I will give you a number now to call to get it all fixed up.”

Charlie adds: “Our committee, the Clonbanin Ambush Centenary Committee, spent the most fabulous day at the Áras.

“I was very proud of my address that day, which I wrote myself,” adds Charlie, a native of Derinagree in north-west Cork. “Although I pointed out that I wasn’t a great or accomplished speaker.”

He is a master storyteller though.

Reading My Life, My Story, My Way, Charlie talks of times gone by, about societal changes over the last seven decades, about hardship, labour, love, community, and immigration. It will appeal to the Irish masses both at home and abroad, evoking nostalgic memories of yesteryear.

In his book, Charlie has outlined an in-depth lifetime of memories and stories that tell of his early days, the hands that raised him, his school days, his time working for local farmers and with animals, about neighbours and communities that interacted during the 1950s right up to the present day.

“I write about my family, about Kitty and Ellen, my two wives, both loves of my life, I write about going to England and working very hard there and raising a family,” says Charlie.

“Times were tough in England when the Irish were not welcome there. The late Bishop Casey was a good friend to us and helped us out when things got rough. There were some rough days to be sure.”

I ask Charlie to tell me about the day he realised he might have dementia, and why the proceeds of My Life, My Story, My Way are going to The North Cork Dementia Alliance Group,

“The first thing I have to say is this,” says Charlie. “I am extremely lucky to have Ellen because I know that, without her, I would greatly struggle.”

Charlie has shown resilience all his life.

“I kept telling myself, it’s not going to beat me,” he says.

“My doctor referred me to the memory resource room at Mallow Primary Healthcare Centre to attend the first of the six-week course with Sheena Cadoo. It was very positive and good for me. This is where I learned to deal with dementia.”

How did he deal with the incident that prompted the diagnosis of dementia in 2018?

“I was driving to Mallow to see a friend who was terminally ill,” says Charlie. “All of a sudden, I felt completely lost. I didn’t have a clue where I was, or who I was, or where I was going or coming from.

“I pulled into the hard shoulder, switched off the engine. I had been in the FCA as a youth and knew not to panic. I sat there with my eyes closed, a total blank feeling. Then I thought of the phone, but I couldn’t remember who I wanted to ring or the number. A few minutes after, the number came to me and I rang Ellen. We went to the GP, and I was diagnosed from there.”

Charlie thrived well from there.

“I decided dementia wasn’t going to beat me. The first thing I learned is to make sure I don’t have the auto-pilot on and switch it off,” he says.

“I’ve learned to say aloud what I’ll do next, like ‘I’m going to boil an egg’. ‘I am going to set my egg timer’.

“One of the best tips I got from Sheena was always have a notebook and pen handy, and write down what you want to remember.”

Charlie is in a position to help others diagnosed with dementia.

“I am really proud to be able to help in some small way,” he says. “Helping others diagnosed with dementia, to accept, understand and be assured it doesn’t mean it’s the beginning of the end. I fully intend to do whatever I can to promote, support and explain my experiences of the services provided to us by the North Cork Dementia Alliances Group.”

The proceeds of his book will help in no small way.

Charlie must be very proud of his book.

“I don’t say I’m proud of anything in my life,” he says. “But yes, I must say I am proud of the book. It is a record for my grandchildren to have.”

He is proud of Ellen too, who proof-read the book.

“She is my soul mate and my rock, and she looks after me,” he says. “Anything I want, Ellen will get it for me, so happy days.”

Charlie also wants to thank his grandson, Dave Drake, for his help with the book. “The person that spent endless hours by my side fixing, sizing and re-sizing, organising and positioning all the photos as well as helping me retrieve material I had accidently deleted, and all the other problems I encountered during the writing of this book.”

Does he want to say anything else?

“Only that I wouldn’t change a minute of my life. I have no regrets.”

Before I say goodbye to Charlie and Ellen, he has a few Irish blessings for me that we haven’t heard in a while.

“May the dreams you hold dearest, be those which come true. The kindness you spread keeps returning to you. May the grass be green you walk on. May blue be the skies above you. That pure be the joys that surround you. May be true the hearts that love you.”

My Life, My Story, My Way, by Charlie Drake, €25. When all initial expenses are recovered, all the following proceeds are being donated to the North Cork Dementia Alliance Group.

Contact Charlie on: 086 8403914 or 029 78017 or email:drake.charliedrake@gmail.com