First of all, I want you to know that I appreciate how difficult this is for you and I think you are very brave to face up to something that you have hidden for so long.
It’s not easy living life as someone that you don’t identify with and I can really feel how stressful it for you.
People that identify as transgender have been more open and public in the last few years and I can totally see how this would impact on you.
If you would like to speak to someone about this, I would recommend getting in touch with Transgender Equality Network Ireland (TENI).
They have a support helpline that you could use, with very experienced and qualified people that understand how you are feeling.
I would suggest getting in touch with them and allowing yourself to tell your story.
Don’t stay living in secrecy, John. We all deserve to live a life as who we really are and sometimes doing that takes courage.
I wish you the very best and I hope that you find the help and support you need.
Best of luck to you.